Smoking

For many years I have been somewhat of an asshole non-smoker. Although I didn't go the extra step of actively nagging smokers to their faces nor whining about any second hand smoke I might be breathing, I did still have an elitist internal attitude about smoking. But for the most part it was a genuine empirical judgement. The fact was that I thought cigarettes smelled bad, I observed that they made the smoker's surroundings yellowed and dirty, and observed that many smokers looked older and more grizzled than their non-smoking brethren. But I tried to restrain my distaste for smoking in a reasonable manner because after all people in my own family are smokers and I can't really get on a soapbox and condemn them. The general cultural notion that smoking is a terrible evil is of course unavoidable and informs one's opinion of it as well.

I began a new philosophical and political journey within the last few years, discovering that there were definitions for the ideas I had always felt. Part of that journey was starting to see different groups of folks who are socially persecuted. Certainly smokers have got to be on the top of that heap. Whereas I usually felt a sense of schadenfreude whenever tales of anti-smoking crackdowns came up, I began to see that they were getting the shaft for no good reason. The contempt for smoking seems to be an almost universal truth in American society. Therein lies the problem; how can an activity which (like it or not) really only affects the person choosing to do it be grounds for such aggression? Smokers as a group have been banished from most indoor places and forced to engage in their "filthy habit" outside in designated areas. Signs are put up to isolate them from non-smokers. For the most part they have shouldered this ostracism with total acceptance. On its surface it makes sense, smoke floats through the air and if you get a bunch of people smoking in a confined space without enough ventilation then yes, it's gonna be very smoky air. Probably not a place a non-smoker would want to be.

So even though for years my asshole non-smoker mind was quietly sneering at these ghastly people who were ruining their lives with yucky tobacco, I was more bothered by the persistent societal manifestation of that same attitude. I began to feel sorry for the underdog. It seemed cruel that these smokers were shouldering all this ostracism with such acceptance. I decided that I ought to switch teams and see how the other half lived. I decided I would try smoking, and one of the reasons would be spite.

Then somehow I got to reading about pipes on the web. I always had a soft spot for pipes. Some of my uncles smoked pipes and when I was at a family gathering with them in my youth I always liked the smell. It was a very rich and woody scent, for whatever reason they didn't remind me of cigarettes which seemed to make me cough and sneeze. Perhaps I had the same view of cigars, I can't remember. Actually I do recall one unpleasant second hand smoke experience at a baseball game where a man a few rows up from us was puffing away at a very smelly stogie. But pipes seemed to be even more rare. I had a picture in my mind of pipe smoking being this activity of kindly old men with long grey beards. It seemed like a quaint thing to do, a relic of a forgotten time or something.

The attraction to pipes really grew once I saw what kinds of beautiful craftsmanship was out there for these things. I am a gear junkie when it comes to hobbies. So pipe smoking seemed cool because there was an instrument involved. Cigarettes and cigars are just rolled up leaves that burn almost entirely to ash. But with pipes there was a collector aspect. There was woodworking and art involved. So I decided I would buy a pipe and try it out. Only I was still completely spooked by the idea of getting ADDICTED to tobacco. You know, that horrific EVIL thing which takes over your life and you can't STOP! So then I came across this whole herbal smoke thing. To make a long story short, it's overpriced. Trying to fight tradition turned out to be kinda futile, so I went ahead and bought a few bags of bulk tobacco. I figure there's gotta be a reason why this particular plant is the one of choice for smoking. The tobacco was more moist than the herbal stuff and seemed to burn better. There's a whole connoisseur aspect to tobacco as well with different flavors and types and whatnot. I can't pretend to know all of that of course.

I was able to get a bit of that old world smell that I remembered from my uncles, but to be honest the smell is much more noticeable when you aren't smoking it. It seems to be more of an external thing. It is noticeable when I first walk into my apartment. I could be wrong, but it does not seem to have as offensive an odor as that of a cigarette smoker's room. Maybe I am completely crackers on this, but I think it has a more pleasant scent. I haven't studied what difference, if any, exists between cigarette tobacco and pipe tobacco.

Is smoking bad for you? Well, you're sucking combustible material into your body, so naturally your body is going to react. I find that there's a lot of phlegm produced in the lungs after smoking. These are just my empirical observations. I quickly learned to take former president Clinton's advice and NOT inhale, though. (joke) No seriously, if you just suck in enough so that the smoke fills your mouth and then blow it out right away you'll do better than if you let a large puff of smoke hit your lungs. I do mean hit, because if you really inhale that stuff it's like getting hit in the chest with a hammer. You can really feel it. But if you just puff on it gently it's a very relaxing and fun leisure activity. I was worried that I would develop an addiction to it, but as of yet I have no cravings. I am actually more concerned that I would not even continue smoking and the beautiful pipes I've got would just sit unused. I bought 6oz. of tobacco in March and there's still about 2/3rds left. I don't smoke at work and I'll have one, maybe two bowls per day but there might be a day or two that I'll not smoke at all. Wikipedia has this to say about pipes:

"Pipes can range from the very simple machine-made briar pipe to handmade and artful implements created by pipe makers which can be very expensive collector's items. The popularity of pipe smoking in Western countries has declined in recent years. However, it has also enjoyed a resurgence of late among younger and middle aged smokers who find its contemplative nature and age-transcendent status as "hobby not habit" to be both thoroughly enjoyable and stress-relieving."

I'd have to strongly agree. Maybe one way of looking at it is that cigarettes seem like McDonalds whereas the pipe is more like a fine meal at a nice restaurant. Yes, I know it will kill you. We're heard every argument. But hey, so does food. Eventually everybody dies. We have yet to find the magical chemical which promises eternal life. Clearly if smoking was as evil as many people would have us believe nobody would be doing it. For all the health problems it causes they still come on slowly enough to as to not defeat the benefits.

The point is you've gotta do these things in moderation. Obviously if you chain smoke one after another there's going to be a price to pay. So don't chain smoke. Take it easy, take it slow. And most importantly of all, get off your high horses and stop sticking your nose into other people's business. I keep feeling that America has this eternal life fantasy and that if you do A, B and C then you'll live long and happy. But what use is eternal life if you can't enjoy it the way you want? We all need to lighten up on those who are lighting up. All this hysteria is just going to give the nanny state more power which will force our individual choices to weigh upon other people's choices and the whole of society will become more bitter and disgruntled. No thanks!